Real regime change

Hiatus over. I need to post about this.

Real regime change comes from inside. I’m not going to get into a semantics argument, but at least we can all agree that it’s less likely to generate an insurgent movement.

We’re now seeing the second such movement of the year in Lebanon (the first one being Yushchenko’s Orange Revolution). Anyway, it appears that the government has collapsed under pressure from popular demonstrations in Beirut and opposition in parliament. This is the kind of regime change Americans need to be encouraging but it always seems to happen without us even knowing that it’s about to.

I suppose one could make the argument that the American intervention in Iraq has encouraged opposition parties to antagonize their governments but I don’t know how valid that is. It’s the kind of self-congratulatory argument that takes credit away from the actual people that faced down oppression. I love it when stupid people parrot out the notion that Reagan ended the Cold War and defeated the Soviet Union. What about the fucking people that stood in front of scores of tanks for days while Reagan, half amnesiac half narcoleptic, was taking mid-afternoon naps?

The U.S. can only assist such movements. And now it needs to foster democracy in Lebanon with surgeon-like precision.

Lebanon is the most liberal Arab country. How liberal? In the Arab world this question answered in by looking at the women of the country. Look at the picture below. Had you no auxiliary information, where would you think these women were from? Najaf or Cleveland? (Also, look at their hands, what do they want? In this context, is that not the most poignant hand gesture you've ever seen?

If that doesn't convince you, then maybe this brief account by an Egyptian friend upon returning from Lebanon will: "you can buy porn in Beirut!"

But it could easily go the other way. This is not an American victory, and it certainly is not an Israeli victory. The Israeli and the Syrians are so pitted against one another that every surrounding country has become a stage for their antagonism. And many innocent Lebanese died because of this. This is a Lebanese victory that Americans and Israelis need to support, while only making sure that there's no outside influence (including from our governments). The Lebanese, if left alone--and they've wanted nothing more for decades--will make the right decision.

A quick word from a supposedly busy man

I've been on a posting hiatus for the past two or three days. I'll start posting when I start liking my job again--or when I am not expected to do actual work at, ahem, work.

My point: Alex Segura Jr., a contributor to AGI, and the man responsible for The Great Curve and its overnight success , has started a blog chronicling the hilarity of his everyday life--I am not being sarcastic. Check it, it's a good one.

Go Westerberg, young man

Though I'm a bit loath to link to Billboard, the mag's site did announce that Paul Westerberg's first -- and coolest -- band, the Replacements, will see their albums reissued in the near future. Despite a link to Westerberg's site that doesn't really take you anywhere, the story also reveals something more about the former 'Mats lead singer/guitarist:

Paul Westerberg will be the subject of a solo retrospective this spring via Rhino. According to the artist's official Web site, the 20-track set will feature two new songs, B-sides and rare tracks, Westerberg's soundtrack contributions and highlights from his post-Replacements releases.

I guess I shouldn't be surprised. My initial reaction was to scoff at another unwarranted and truthfully unnecessary compilation/best-of/box set/whatever-the-fuck. But if Toto can get the magic treatment, why not Paul, arguably one of the 10 best band leaders in rock history? Hell, everyone likes 14 Songs. I'd argue, though, that Westerberg's most innovative post-Replacements work doesn't even feature his name. Do yourself a favor and check out his wonderfully stripped-down work with pseudo-rock outfit Grandpaboy. Westerberg plays all the instruments, sure, but this is the closest he's come to reigniting the glory that was The Replacements.

And for those on the pointless reunion watch, Westerberg recently revealed he'd written a song with former 'Mats bassist Tommy Stinson for the film Elizabethtown.

But I wouldn't hold your breath:

And while the likelihood of a Replacements reunion remains slim ("It can't be the Replacements without Chris [Mars] the drummer, and he's moved on into art and doesn't really want to come back," Westerberg told Jones), a host of reissues are in the works.

Come to me, all you rabble-rousing academic plutocrats!

The best essay I've read about the Ward Churchill vs Bill O'Reilly kerfuffle appeared in this week's Village Voice. Illinois State University professor Curtis White argues that Churchill and O'Reilly are bound to one another, a blustering Judas Iscariot and Jesus of Nazareth, hostages of a socio-economic system without which they couldn't profit. This is not, needless to say, an observation of world-historic originality (paging Borges and Wilde), but sometimes the most obvious points need stressing:

This is not something Americans should fault him for. In all of these ways he is quite typically American. He's movin' on up, for God's sake. He is in the most unexceptional way a whore to the system he claims to hate. He, too, is a Good German. We all are. In the end, we go to work, do what's expected of us (even if that means just assigning grades), and accept our paycheck (and a nice six-figure thing that can be for a full professor at a flagship institution like Colorado, and you get to live in Boulder!). Worst of all, at the end of the year we pay our taxes, which we know are going toward things that would break our hearts to witness. And we have little choice but to continue to do these things

It's mildly gratifying to read an academic with a grain of modesty.

And the World's Most Mean-Spirited Music Critic Award goes to....

Dom Passantino of Stylus magazine. Here's the first sentence of his review of Tori Amos's latest, The Beekeeper:

I'm going to hell anyway, so I may as well come out and say what you’d be thinking if you sat all the way through Tori Amos’ career from Y Kant Tori Read to The Beekeeper: the only way that we’re going to get a good album from her in this day and age is if someone has the decency to abduct and kill her daughter.

Points also for misspelling Beekeeper in the second paragraph, and finally getting to what amounts to quite a flaccid review of the cd in the penultimate paragraph. Keep 'em coming, Dom!

Road Kill Gummi Candy, nuff said.

Points go to Kraft for gross-out chewables:

The fruity-flavored Trolli Road Kill Gummi Candy — in shapes of partly flattened snakes, chickens and squirrels — fosters cruelty toward animals, according to the New Jersey Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals.

Doesn't beat Testa-Mints for originality, though...

All Hail Darth Pope!

I just know the bastards at Vatican City are gonna build a faster, stronger Pope, somehow....

VATICAN CITY The health of Pope John Paul II took a serious turn for the worst Thursday as a tracheotomy was performed on him to ease troubled breathing, which forced his second emergency hospitalization in a month....

I wonder who's gonna play the part of Yoda?

Only if you're gentle, Rep. Cadman...

Choice words by Rep. Bill Cadman, R-Colorado Springs, to Rep. Val Vigil, D-Thornton, courtesy of Rocky Mountain News:

"If you try that again, I'll ram my fist up your ass."

Oh, those reppies and their potty mouths....

This Gannon/Guckert thing is not even fun anymore

Gannon/Guckert on the Today show. Stolen from AMERICAblog; the complete transcript can be found at MSNBC:

Brown: You have said that you registered a number of pornographic Web sites. Is that accurate?

Gannon: Well, I registered a number of domain names, that some have suggested are…

Brown: Pornographic Web sites.

Gannon: Well, yes.

Brown: Did you advertise yourself as a gay, male escort for hire on a Web site?

Gannon: I cannot go into those specifics. I can tell you that there is a lot of misinformation out there. There's a lot of fabrication out there, and a lot of misinformation.

Brown: Why can't you then clear it up right now? The cameras are rolling.

Gannon: As I've said, I've been advised not to get into the specifics out there. Is there some truth out there? Yes. Is there a lot of falsehood out there? Absolutely.

Does anyone know why Alas, a Blog is no longer up? That was a good blog.

Hitch on HST

From Christopher Hitchens obit on Hunger S. Thompson. Bringing out the Dead indeed:

"He was never one to hang around when it was time to go," a mutual friend e-mailed me on Monday. The realization that this might have occurred to him before it occurred to us is a very melancholy one.

NEWS SO BREAKING IT'S BROKEN!!!!!

The Pope's still a spazz, but a spazz with a recurring case of the heebeejeebees.

"I Support the Occupation of Iraq, But I Don't Support Our Troops"

From The Onion (thank you Liza):

The U.S. went to war in Iraq to remove an evil and dangerous political adversary from power. Now that we have done that, the American troops must remain in Iraq until the country is a fully functioning democracy, able to spark change throughout the entire Middle East. While I find this obvious, there are still a lot of people in our country who fail to grasp it. I support Bush-administration foreign-policy goals, but I stand firmly against the individual men and women on the ground in the Persian Gulf.
Yes, occupying Iraq does require troops, but they are there for one reason and one reason only: to carry out the orders of the U.S. Defense Department. As far as their overall importance goes, they are no more worthy of our consideration than a box of nails. Ribbons and banners in ostensible "support" of the troops miss the whole point of the invasion, which is to gain a strategic hold over that volatile and lucrative geopolitical region.

How do you expect to be taken seriously?

Me on the Pet Shop Boys in Stylus Magazine. I wish they were still as consistently funny as this.

BREAKING NEWS!!!

The Pope's a spazz.

In "Memory and Identity," the Pope also calls abortion a "legal extermination" comparable to attempts to wipe out Jews and other groups in the 20th century....

In one section about the role of lawmakers, the Pope takes another swipe at gay marriages when he refers to "pressures" on the European Parliament to allow them.

"It is legitimate and necessary to ask oneself if this is not perhaps part of a new ideology of evil, perhaps more insidious and hidden, which attempts to pit human rights against the family and against man," he writes.

Does the Dalai Lama also hate homos?

Toothless poodle

It's unfortunate that Attack Poodles and Other Media Mutants is merely serviceable entertaiment instead of classic. James Wolcott's blog and Vanity Fair column are a delight; his prose is erudite and demotic, worthy of someone who admires Pauline Kael.

Attack Poodles goes after easy targets: the mediacracy whose members publish in the New York Times (Brooks, Dowd), the Washington Post (Krauthammer, Broder), and populate scores of cable talk shows (rattle off the list: Wolf Blitzer, George Will, Cokie Roberts, Fred Barnes, Bill O'Reilly, etc). To whom is this book addressed? All that distinguishes Attack Poodles from the left-wing/right-wing screeds piled on bookstore remaindered tables is Wolcott's prose, which in this book is distressing. Let's see: cliches and facile alliteration (Mickey Kaus "slices and dices" Hillary's "sallow soul"); description worthy of Mickey Spillane paperbacks (Of Max Boot: "He has the soft cheeks of a baby-faced killer and a byline that spells danger."); lazy thinking (he calls Ann Coulter "the Paris Hilton of postmodern politics" after reminding attack poodles that "pop-cult patter dates fast"); and an obtuse reverence for old fellas like Walter Cronkite and Helen Thomas ("an unglamorous reminder of a more civic, idealistic era," ahem). Irreverence and sentimentality are a nauseous mix, even for sallow souls.

Kael and Wolcott's other idol Gore Vidal would have yawned and asked Jimmy for a drink. A pity.

A Dean, mean, fighting machine

John Nichols comments on the "election" of former Democratic presidential candidate Howard Dean to lead the DNC. He says:

With the selection of Howard Dean as its chairman, the 213-year-old Democratic Party has become something it has not been for a long time: exciting.

...unlike past DNC chairs, Dean won't have to scream for attention. Taking over as chairman of a party that is locked out of the White House and unable to muster anything more than a "minority leader" to flex its legislative muscle, Dean has positioned himself as the most camera-ready Democrat in the country.

This is fairly accurate. People are excited, sure. And Dean will definitely be one of the most visible Dems around. But is that a sign that the Democrats are inching closer to a solution, or fueling the problem? Let's try this. Step back for a second and tell me who the chairman of the GOP is. Could you name him without clicking on my oh-so-technologically-savvy embedded link? Exactly.

Mississippi Congressman Bennie Thompson sums up the pro-Dean sentiment when he says Dean will "bring new spirit and new energy to the party, the likes of which we haven't seen in a long time."

Now, don't get me wrong. I'm not trying to pooh-pooh the ascension of Dean. I personally like the guy. He was my early choice in the primaries. I think he will do some good for the party, and maybe slap some sense into "veteran" Democrats still posing at the Republican look alike contest. If anything, he can help get a party once known for it's strong ties to the working class and minorities away from the corporate puppet masters and back to the liberal, grass roots efforts that make younger voters gravitate to the Green Party. At least that's the ideal.

But the DNC chair can't do everything. Not in the fashion Nichols suggests. Especially since he won't be running for president in 2008. Making someone who won't be a candidate your most visible and vocal party member kind of poses a problem.

So, who's left? Certainly not John Kerry or John Edwards. That's the bigger question. Because in the end, people didn't think about Terry MCauliffe when casting their votes in 2004, and they won't be thinking about Howard Dean in 2008.

Guillermo Cabrera Infante, R.I.P.

The best Cuban novelist of the last 50 years died yesterday afternoon. He was much an irritant to the Castro regime as Hunter S. Thompson was to Nixon, except that Cabrera lived under the constant threat of assassination. Go read tres tristes tigres now.

Good article from NYT on Cuban independent libraries and their supporters stateside.

In this ever changing world in which we live in...

The music blogs I frequent have torn a new one in Andrew Sullivan for this mawkish drivel, in which he blames iPods for the increasing atomization of society. In pronouncements that rival Nick Hornby's for sheer bathetic generalization, Sullivan informs us that it takes a village (a global one?) to raise a child:

Music was once the preserve of the living room or the concert hall. It was sometimes solitary but it was primarily a shared experience, something that brought people together, gave them the comfort of knowing that others too understood the pleasure of a Brahms symphony or that Beatles album.

Guess Sullivan's been too busy tittering with the other Beltway corpses on "The Chris Matthews Show" to attend concerts. Or hasn't tossed out the Walkman and Discman taking up space on his closet shelves.

Say Nope to Dope

http://www.abc.net.au/news/newsitems/200502/s1306960.htm

We all agree that Doug Wead has an unfortunate name, but do his tapes accomplish anything other than to make him seem weasely and untrustworthy, and Bush touchingly concerned about his role as a leader?

Thirty-Ought-Six Salute!

HST was a linkage, a nodal point deserving one final hurrah here on A Grand Illusion.

From NYT:

Mr. Thompson managed to live and write his own version of the Heisenberg principle: That the observer not only changes events by his presence, but his presence also frequently surpasses the event in terms of importance.

Slainte!

The political dance that no one watches

I link to The Herald only because I first came across this story while editing on the night desk. Apparently, failed Democratic (or "Demmie," as some seem to say around these parts) VP candidate John Edwards might not perform the same bow-and-back-off maneuver that fellow failure Joe Leiberman vowed to do in 2004 for former running mate Al Gore. Could we see Edwards facing off against ticket-buddy John Kerry?

EDWARDS WON'T STEP ASIDE FOR KERRY
RALEIGH -- Former vice presidential candidate John Edwards will not talk about whether he plans to run for the White House in 2008, but he is not pledging to stand aside if running mate John Kerry tries again. Edwards said in an interview aired Sunday on ABC's This Week that he and Kerry have talked often since they lost in November.

Seriously folks, who cares? Aside from playing second fiddle to Barbara Boxer during the at-times-interesting-but-largely-irrelevant Condi Rice Secretary of State confirmation hearings, has Kerry really made enough noise for anyone to tab him the Democratic frontrunner? I mean, sure, he's shown a tad of humanity (which would have been really keen during the presidential campaign) since his loss, but what does that add up to? Not much, except a few bits of interesting trivia. Let's face it. It's very unlikely Kerry -- or Gore, for that matter -- will pull a Dick Nixon and win the presidency on the second or third try. America doesn't like losers. At least not Democratic ones.

And more importantly, back to Edwards, will the former senator even merit more than a blip on the political radar even if he manages the near-impossible feat of recapturing the lightning in a bottle he had during the 2004 primaries? Doubtful. So, in essence, Edwards has tried to make this bit of non-news into something that could light the few twigs still lying around the 2004 Campaign campfire. I can't blame him. He'll probably have a lot of spare time on his hands for the next few years.

"And sink their bones to Davy Jones, hooray!"

Her Majesty's Navy, the thing people used to be scared of 100 years ago, is implementing a number of measures to better accommodate gay sailors. Hurray for them. I might even forgive that whole armada debacle now. From NYT:

LONDON (AP) -- Britain's navy, which until five years ago banned gays from its workforce, said Monday it is joining a campaign to ensure homosexual employees are fairly treated.
The military also announced gay servicemen and women will be able to live in married quarters with their partners starting later this year.
The Royal Navy said it was entering a program organized by gay rights group Stonewall which advises employers on dealing with gay, lesbian and bisexual staff.

Just in case we overstate our importance...

...here's Montaigne (from "On Experience") to bring us down to earth:

There is a great deal of self-love and arrogance in judging so highly of yourself that you are obliged to disturb the public peace in order to establish them...

The Patriots

Patriotism’s gotta go. Of all the –isms it is one of the least contested, so pervasive that it escapes criticism, (indeed, punishes criticism wherever it meets it.) And yet it is one of the deadliest modes of thought, closest in spirit to racism. Both patriotism and racism design a group of people as superior and defendable, (one based on race, the other in geography.) Racism has long been exposed as a virulent ideology, but one has to remember this wasn’t always so, and that a defender of the race was once a hero. Might not a patriot, then, years from one, be exposed the way racists are now exposed? Might not patriotism be exposed as the xenophobia it really is?

Let me propose this: you’re in a foreign land, perhaps you’re a Yankee doing a tour of Italy, and a certain cultural and geographical isolation will cause to latch on to a Southerner on the same tourist group. Great! A friendship! But this positive veil cannot obscure the fact that anything that unites two or more people is also potentially dividing them from the rest. The friendship between those two American tourists is an act of hostility towards the whole of Italy, because they are implicitly saying that while Italy may have fine ruins, they’re better appreciated from an American perspective.

A pattern of cultural superiority, (or at least cultural preferability) is created. One might say that the friendship between those two American tourists is harmless, (they don’t hate Italians, they just prefer being with someone with a shared cultural background). But isn’t this how racism was conducted? Few white slave owners actively hated their slaves; instead most felt a paternal sort of love. Does this not make the separation between black and white as abhorrent as the separation between, say, American and Italian? (I use Italians to follow our little touring metaphor: more obvious examples are plentiful.)

It’s interesting that while extreme religiosity or differing economic systems are often blamed for war, it is patriotism, geographical combat, that most often leads to armed conflict and death. It kills. Growing up in a Communist country we were made to memorize (without irony) a famous speech from a 19th century verse play by the Cuban national poet, Jose Marti. The quote goes like this:

El amor madre a la patria
No es el amor ridículo a la tierra,
Ni a la hierba que pisan nuestras plantas;
Es el odio invencible a quien la oprime,
Es el rencor eterno a quien la ataca...

Roughly translated (by me) it reads:

The love, mother, for a country
Is not the ridiculous love for the land,
Of for the grass on which we step;
It is invincible hatred to those who oppress it,
It is eternal wrath towards those who attack it.

The Communist teachers meant it as a rousing speech to arms, (this is what patriotism was built to do: rouse to arms). But it perhaps unintentionally exposes the truth: patriotism isn’t about love, it’s about hatred. In an age in which we must accept either global cooperation or destruction, patriotism is a threat to all. It will be shown to be parochial close-mindedness at best, and deadly racism at worst.

Hunter S. Thompson, RIP.

Mr. Fear and Loathing is dead. I couldn't stand his stuff; his influence is fairly malign, inspiring writers to plumb autobiographical depths for prurience's sake. Gore Vidal once wrote about Tennessee Williams:

By and large, American novelists and playwrights have not had to kill themselves in order to be noticed. There are still voluntary readers and restless playgoers out there. But since so many American writers gradually drink themselves to death (as do realtors, jockeys, and former officers of the Junior League), these sodden buffaloes are now attracting the sort of Cautionary Tale-spinner that usually keens over suicide-poets.

Thompson was one more writer who couldn't live up to the absurd machista pose with which he'd wooed scores of would-be journalists.

Pure pop for now people?

I usually can't stand Paul McCartney, but in light of the acclaim for Brian Wilson's Smile last year, I had to defend Macca in Stylus against charges of irrelevance. For addled pop at its most unassuming, he has no peer.

But I still can cook a mean Denver omelette!

Kirsten Powers in Salon claims that Harvard president Lawrence Summers made gender inequities that much worse with his infamos remarks. I'm surprised by how many letters to the editor disagreed with her (as do I). Here's one representative one, by a woman:

As far as I can tell, Summers was merely pointing out that genetic differences might be a cause of the continued underrepresentation of women. We are all born with different abilities -- that's a fact. And genetic inferiority in some abilities is in no way demeaning. Women are clearly genetically inferior to men in many physical abilities. Does acknowledging those differences disparage us? No! But Powers implicitly asserts that having lesser abilities means we are lesser people, and that idea is much more dangerous than Summers'.

Katherine Hepburn's line in The African Queen is the most sensible response to this pseudo-controversy: "Nature, Mr. Allnutt, is what we were placed on this earth to rise above."

He's still `Bubba' to me

A charming New York Times piece on the apparently genuine friendship that has developed between former presidents Bush and Clinton.

So this is the (most) controversial part of Larry Summers' speech from a couple of weeks ago. The full transcript, which Summers' office had until now refused to release, can be found here.

It is after all not the case that the role of women in science is the only example of a group that is significantly underrepresented in an important activity and whose underrepresentation contributes to a shortage of role models for others who are considering being in that group. To take a set of diverse examples, the data will, I am confident, reveal that Catholics are substantially underrepresented in investment banking, which is an enormously high-paying profession in our society; that white men are very substantially underrepresented in the National Basketball Association; and that Jews are very substantially underrepresented in farming and in agriculture. These are all phenomena in which one observes underrepresentation, and I think it's important to try to think systematically and clinically about the reasons for
underrepresentation.
There are three broad hypotheses about the sources of the very substantial disparities that this conference's papers document and have been documented before with respect to the presence of women in high-end scientific professions. One is what I would call the-I'll explain each of these in a few moments and comment on how important I think they are-the first is what I call the high-powered job hypothesis. The second is what I would call different availability of aptitude at the high end, and the third is what I would call different socialization and patterns of discrimination in a search. And in my own view, their importance probably ranks in exactly the order that I just described.

In a bit of poetic justice, Summers' only defense--a poor one too--seems to be a variation on the logic that he used to point out anti-Semitism on his campus a couple of years ago, if not in intent then in execution. His comments are definitely misguided but they don't strike me as intentionally so.

professor b has a long rant on the subject, most of which I disagree with but it is very entertaining. She seems to think that Summers is saying that women are simply not as good as men in the field of science. He is saying that. But she ignores the fact that he acknowledges that women are better than men in other fields. This is very nice but Summers doesn't go on to name any of them. I can't think of a single field where women outnumber and outgross men to a comparative degree.

Anyway, check back later on tonight for a picture of David Byrne (my roommate's cat) in celebration of Friday Cat Blogging.

Contribute!

A Grand Illusion is looking for contributors. Preferably women, preferably left-wing. Althought exceptions will be made for the exceptionally talented. Talented right-wing men? That should narrow the pool to two people who have yet to be born.

Damn GOP Homosexual Escort Infiltrators!!!

Let's hear what a student paper has to say about our future prez:

Consider a campaign slogan, "America: We Love Homosexual Prostitutes." Would it be acceptable for a conservative president to endorse this slogan by saying, "I am Gorge W. Bush and I support this message?" Because Bush supports a gay marriage ban, how is it possible for his camp to be happy about a conservative, Republican front man sporting these kinds of credentials?

I have no clue what this guy's talking about, but no matter. The real question churning in all our craniums is:

If the White House News Room is the new Red Light District, who's up for giving The Washingtonienne a hard pass?

Happy National Condom Week!

I was thinking of wearing one in celebration. But alas, what would the purpose of monogamy be then?

Fabiana at Foreign Affairs Blog sums up the Bush/Kerry dymanic in the best, most succinct way I can think of:

Like Bush is nothing without Osama bin Laden, Kerry is nothing without Bush.

You'll laugh, then you'll cry

On treason:

It’s all the rage these days! In fact you may be a traitor and not even know it! Well a lotta traitors start off not even tryin to be traitors, it is just that easy to do! Treason isn't just providin aid an comfort to the enemy. It's providin not-aid an discomfort to America. Treason is hurting America's feelings.Now you may think "oh well Fafnir America's a big country it can take care a itself" but in fact it is very sensitive. When you say its mom's ugly or criticize its foreign policy or kick sand on its face at the beach it is just as hurt as if you'd sold its state secrets. Like every emotional young superpower America needs love and care from its citizens. We've put together a brief guide to treason so you can understand it a little better.

Q: Which of the following is treason?
1. Not wishing the President a happy birthday even when he is clearly wearing a party hat and a "Kiss The Birthday Boy" shirt
2. Questioning the progress, purpose, or justification of the Iraq war
3. Providing material aid to a hostile enemy of the United States
4. Telling America "Hey America yo mama's so fat by the time she bends over it's Daylight Savings Time."

Answer: All of them are treason but number four is the worst treason of all on account of America is real sensitive about the fatness of its mama.

Who else has deep feelings of insecurity when social?

Jeepers Creepers...

Richard Cohen, telling gay men to straighten up their lifestyles, so to speak. As Miami is the AIDS epicenter, it's doubly relevant - and shameful that a heterosexual had to be the one wagging his finger.

Fun blog.

And it only took them 35 years to realize that.

From NYT:

JERUSALEM (AP) -- Israel will abandon a decades-old policy of demolishing the homes of Palestinian suicide bombers and gunmen, accepting an army panel's assessment that the practice does not deter attacks and should be stopped, the military said Thursday.

I love that Israel still claims the practice as its "legal right," which prompts the question, what doesn't Israel claim as its legal right?

A tidbit of wisdom by Christopher Hitchens that I wanted to share with you all. From a lecture on Thomas Paine:

By the way, every time I hear people saying there won't be a Jeffersonian democracy in Iraq, I want to say, “None of my Iraqi or Kurdish friends own any slaves,” so perhaps there won't be, at that.

Show me! Show you!

The three things that made my day:

1. Dowd on our future Prez...
2. The solution we all saw coming for "the SS thing..."
3. Kikkoman revised...

Let's give it up for Ebonics Poet Laureate!

Hands down the funniest newsbite I've read all year! Even more hilarious than anything that annoying Gannon guy ever uttered! Whatchu say Amiri? Say it aint so:

What kind of sleaza is Condoleezza?

One mo time!

What kind of sleaza is Condoleezza?

Sounds like the new Demmie rallying cry...

Gannon for Prez?

Let's give it up for massive left-wing investigators!

“The Gannon ‘scandal’ would be laughable, were it not for the fact that Gannon’s personal privacy has been invaded and his mother, in her 70s, had to endure harassing telephone calls from those on the political left,” said Accuracy in Media (AIM) Editor Cliff Kincaid. “The campaign demonstrates the paranoid mentality and mean-spirited nature of the political left.”

No, no, Cliff. The reason this is laughable is because of the 70 year old mother! You Reppies have no sense of humor...

And about that "mean-spirited nature of the political left" thing: Who is it that's trying to ban gay marriage, again? Oh hush, now, you patriot, you....

Hitch vs. Hitch

Got this nifty little item from Toddsgirl. She compares and contrasts the new film Hitch and ye Trotskyist of yore, Christopher Hitchens.

—Hitch favors democracy in Iraq and has been a staunch defender of Shiite Pentagon favorite Ahmed Chalabi.
—Hitch star Will Smith was once the "Fresh Prince of Bel Air," suggesting he is a Royalist.

Christopher Hitchen's soon to be published treatise on black America, Doggy Style: America's Unseemly Fascination With All Things Shizzle, or How I Stopped Worrying and Learned to Drop It Like It's Hot, comes out on the first day of the month following March...

Oh Darwin, Where Art Thou?

Found this Rep. Tom Coburn (R-OK) quote on William Gibson's blog. You know what I thought when I first read that? It's about damn time I begin production on my The O.C. rip-off emo-dramedy, tentatively titled My So-Called Copernicus.

And because no mention of lesbians shall go unnoticed, here's another quote from our favorite nerf-herding troglodyte:

Lesbianism is so rampant in some of the schools in southeast Oklahoma that they'll only let one girl go to the bathroom. Now think about it. Think about that issue. How is it that that's happened to us?" —Rep. Tom Coburn (R-Okla.)

Please, raise your hand (your other hand) if you are thinking about the issue...

Where's Deep Thought when you need it?

Well, the answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything seems to be...52.

Broken Heart Syndrome...

Is this the real reason Adam never divorced Eve? And if it's true, why aint Michael Moore pushing up daisies? Matter of fact, why didn't I expire in the third grade? Paging Dr. Phil...

Where were you while we were getting high?

Well, obviously not in North Korea, Iran, or Israel...

What's wrong with silly love songs?

Normally not a Paul fan, despite my guarded respect for some of the rather barmy confections scattered on limp albums, I dug up an out of print obscurity from 1986 called "Press to Play" and enjoyed it - guardedly. Here's the review I published in Stylus magazine.

Now's the time for bloggers to read Stylus often if they already aren't. It features some of the most enthusiastic music and film writing on the web. And we're damn better than Pitchfork.

What is Ouch, Mr. Trebek?

Upon reading this news item, I instantly ransacked the nether boulevards of my cranium for fun facts involving torture, Cuba, and the American way. I quickly jotted them all down and took them to my local FOX NEWS affiliate and presented them with a jovial way to pilfer the wacky idea those darn Brits beat us to.

Needless to say, I am now a millionaire and hooking up with Paris Hilton... in France.

2004 Pazz & Jop Poll

The Village Voice's annual Pazz & Jop poll, which compiles the top 10 albums and singles from more than 700 critics (and to which I contributed), is up. Rather predictably, Kanye West's "The College Dropout" and Franz Ferdinand's "Take Me Out" won Best Album and Single, respectively.

Editor Robert Christgau's lead essay is rather good, but the Comments section showcases some rather impressive (and frequently vulgar) bits of informal criticism.

Look, Ma! It's a bird! It's a plane!

No, son. It's just the Hubble Telescope taking a suicidal plunge into the Earth's atmosphere....